Describing how I feel

I’ve tried many times to explain to people how I feel not for sympathy but so they can know why I act or look the way I do. The one thing my mum always says is that I don’t look depressed (lol) so my mental health must be good right now. The problem with me is that I’m high functioning. I will go and do things because I do t want to be perceived as being boring but 99% of the time I hate it and would rather be at home crocheting. I’ve often said I’ve run out of fuel like a car and I just can’t go on I can’t do anything. That’s when I’m fairly catatonic and stuck to my sofa. I have days where I feel like I’m drowning but not in water, in sand. If you’ve ever tried climbing a sand dune you’ll know it’s hard, you feel like you’ve traveled far because of how difficult it is but you’ve climbed a few feet! All the struggle you’ve faced in this climb seems useless because you’re not going anywhere. That’s one of my common feelings.